? EVER WONDER WHY ?

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America..do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America..do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. (THIS ONE ALWAYS BUGGED ME!)

9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking cre atures'.

10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

The story given below is quite interesting and really gives us an insight
into DECISION MAKING.
Which one will you choose?

A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use
while the other disused.
Only one child played on the disused track, the rest on the operational
track.

The train came, and you were just beside the track interchange.

You could make the train change its course to the disused track and saved
most of the kids.
However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track
would be sacrificed.
Or would you rather let the train go its way?


Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make.

YOU HAVE TO MAKE A DECISION BEFORE YOU PROCEED! THE TRAIN WON'T STOP TO
WAIT FOR YOU!

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Most people might choose to divert the course of the train, and sacrifice
only one child. You might think the same way, I guess.

Exactly, I thought the same way initially because to save most of the
children at the expense of only one child was rational decision most
people would make, morally and emotionally. But, have you ever thought
that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact made the
right decision to play at a safe place?

Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who
chose to play where the danger was.

This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday. In the office, community,
in politics and especially in a democratic society, the minority is often
sacrificed for the interest of the majority, no matter how foolish or
ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the
minority are.

The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was
sidelined. And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for
him.

The friend who forwarded me the story said he would not try to change the
course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the
operational track should have known very well that track was still in use,
and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens.

If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he
never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that
track was not in use probably because it was not safe.
If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all
passengers on board at stake! And in your attempt to save a few kids by
sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to
save these few kids.

While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to
be made, we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the
right one.

"Remember that what's right isn't always popular... and what's popular
isn't always right."

Everybody makes mistakes; that's why they put erasers on pencils.

Want to see something worth seeing? This email has the best still picture effect and if you look long enough, you'll see the hidden picture. Copy and paste the link below. Enjoy and let me know the outcome of it whether you see it or not? I could after some time.

http://home.attbi.com/~n9ivo/whatswrong.swf

Quick Eye Exam...

This will blow your mind...!

Just do it - don't cheat!!!!!!!!!!!!

Try this its actually quite good.

But don't cheat!






Count the number of F's in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE
RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC
STUDY COMBINED WITH THE
EXPERIENCE OF YEARS


Managed it?
Scroll down only after you have counted them!
OK?

How many?

Three?

Wrong, there are six - no joke!

Read again!

In New York park, a young boy was attacked by a savage dog. A passerby
happend to see that and came to the rescue. Having tackled the dog, he
stgrangled it to death, and saved the young boy. A reporter for a news
paper
watching all this and took snap shots for a front page picture in the next
days paper. Approaching our hero he says: "Your heroic feat shall be
published in tomorrow's paper under the headline - Brave New Yorker rescues
boy".

"I"m not from New York" replied our brave hero. "oh in that case we'll
change the headline to - Brave American rescues boy from savage dog". "I'm
not American either" replied our brave hero, "I am a Pakistani". The next
day the headline on the front page of the paper said: "Muslim
Fundamentalist
strangles an innocent American dog to death in New York park. FBI are
investigating possible link to the Al-Qaeda."

Funny how your racial background helps you in situations.

This is the latest update I can do up considering the amount of time that I've put into it, I still feel like I'm getting nowhere, lost, demotivated, aimless, walking in a direction where I seem to be getting farther from where I should be arriving at. Will invite a few more members into this Blog quite soon as I've changed from the old address to this particular one.

Woke up with much anticipation and I'd even let me Chloe sleep with me on the bed coz I thought that she's gonna have the surgery so soon and won't be able to experience 'pleasure' and produce offsprings seems heartless but to many, it's the norm to do so. Yes yes... you people must be thinking how lucky I am to have a bitch sleeping with me on a cold winter night huh? But it came from the heart.

And when dawn had approached, I had gotten ready for the send off and did me vegetarian shopping near my hood but found out that Chloe was too early to be undergo the surgery due to risks that could threathen her health to the brain. What's the word I'm looking for again? yeah... something hemmorage?.....Ya following me beautiful people?

Yahoo pool seems interesting and addictve huh? Yeah, once I start i can't stop. At this moment I have a friend who's playing it now as I'm typing this out or it was 2 of them. raise your hands if you're reading this people. i dont' wanna name names.......will one day show me supremacy in the world pool on the fibre optical world. You so called hustlers just wait.... i'll show ya who's da boss around here. (",)

I had realised over the past few days, when you just feel like giving up, life seems to be too wonderful and lovely to let go of. I had looked in the mirror just today and which i was grooming me hair, I had realised that there are days in which you hair seems to be lookoing good all day and there are days when whatever you seem to do to yer hair be it twist, pull, curl, pluck, swirl or even cut, the results seemed hopeless. That's what I felt for the journey of 'Life'. I never understood the saying that "You seemed to have woken up from the wrong side of the bed", to me it's a load of crap.

In this stage of my life now, I feel just so odd and peculiar on how the world works. The life that Music had brought into my life since the past as well as the present. Maybe i'm the odd one out, but haven't you had days when a song suddenly appears over the broadcast reminds you of the good ol' days? This is when I start reminiscing about the past when the song was played and portrayed the timeframe or shall I say bygone days when I was much younger and the fun and excitement I had during that particular point of time in my adolescent and teens years. Does the essence of music depict your life the same way it goes for me in your life? I'm just too inquisitive and curious at times, i mean MOST of the time.

Is the path that I chose a wrong one? Am I in the right track to my future and career? Will this take me somewhere else? Will I just wake up one fine day and realize when I had reached my goals and dreams and begin to question myself, "Why am I in Mexico? What brought me here? The Jalapenos', the Tortillas', the Nachos', or is it the Tacos'?" But true as a fact, you have no idea and control over the precedence of your life and you may soon ask yourself that question on what, why and how you ended up there. But lets not question fate now and worry too much about what tomorrow has to offer but carry on your journey in the present as you have done so well till now and let tomorrow worry for itself.

"Yesterday is the history, Tomorrow is a mystery, and Today is a GIFT, so treasure every moment of what today has to offer and make something out of it as it is not called the PRESENT for no reason."

I have made sure my hook, line and sinker is at its best condition, but somehow out of the millions of fishes in the sea, none are biting and why is that so? The 'catch of the day' is somehow out there and I ain't asking too much now am I? I'm not asking for a 'Marlin' or even a 'Coelacanth' or even more to ask the 'the six gilled shark'. Many a times I asked, "Am I using the wrong bait, a weak fishing line, the wrong rod or am I lack of skills in the game of fishing. But one quality I'd say I have which is the key characteristic of 'PATIENCE'. Am I not going far out enough for the deep sea challenge or am I always at the wrong spot at the wrong time? I think I better change me bait to a piece of deep fried bacon I reckon.Maybe I need the help and expertise of a few good men out there just like Jack Cousteau.

Another good man leaving tomorrow and tonights the pre-party as we are celebrating for him to leave. hahaha. The post party set in the mean time would be somewhere in Parnell, Apollo Bar. But we are hoping to get there sober, keeping our fingers crossed. The man that offered his help to a lady by swinging the door open for her but instead slippped and fell like he needed more help compared to her. Those were the Kodak moments where the presence of a camera should have done justice to the word 'laughter' and 'blooper'. Gonna miss this dude with the 'popeye' calves none other than Mr. YWT.

Enlighthening moment: Interesting facts.
1) It's physically impossible for you to lick your elbow. (without the help of the other hand or any other hand so to speak)
2) Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.
3) All polar bears are left-handed.
4) TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
5) A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
6) Butterflies taste with their feet.
7) Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
8) Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
9) A snail can sleep for three years.(bet you thought the king of slumberland was the bear hibernating eh?)
10) Almost everyone who reads this blog will try to lick their elbow!

Well, the night started out as a boys night out in BandarBunga Rest. and proceeded on to Cardiac arrest club. The ommmph just wasn't there that night. By the time we felt like leaving, the crowd started coming in by the loads. The O---+ wanted to to go for some grub but we told them to hold their horses, we convinced them that the night can't end just like that and we went ahead to GlobeBar. After a while there, I surveyed for opinions about which establishment was a better choice and no doubt Globe seemed to be in favour. The night suttled down with late night grub catching @ McD's and KebabKing for the 'Jelak Club'. Till the next day............or maybe tonight... Saturday? Wonder what will be in store for us tonight. CHeers.... (",)

Ethics was indeed a sad and crappy ass the next day. With full anticipation we went, had realised that without the effort to fully understand and read the readings before class does help out in preventing our asses smoked in lectures. Was told that the new lecturer was a nice and friendly one and the indirect slap across our faces were felt with slashing sensation. As good as we took it, another smack across the face came my result for me assessment. How would I even think of enrolling for me honours with me border range results, you tell me.

A trip to the salon with the 1007 gang as it was a momentous day for a fellow 'John Rzeznik', 'Beck' and 'mama'. The results? Rzeznik was pretty regretful at first but later on slowly adapted to the change as nothing can be done about it, Beck came out looking like 'Johnny Bravo' and at another angle looking like 'The Pet Detective'. And finally....... mama came out looking like mama......tune on to the next few days of what Auckland has in store for us all. Till then..........

Enlighthening moment for today. Everyday passes so fast for the nocturnals that when dusk hits, the regret comes in a package alongside it as well. Do enjoy....Let's just say you have 2 cows and this is a simple culture and background differences depending on where you are from...

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk
of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of
an ordinary cow and
produce twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called
'Cowkimon' and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat
once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5,000 cows and none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment and high bovine productivity.
You have the newsman who reported on the numbers
arrested.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at RM0.06
per litre.
Then midway through, you raised the price to RM0.60 or
you cut the
supply.
When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change
your mind again and
now wants RM1.20.
The buyer decided you can keep the milk and they go
look for milk that
comes from recycled cows.
Your two cows retire together with the Prime Minister.

The human race with dignity.

And they call some of these people "retarded"... A few
years ago, at the Seattle Special Olympics, nine
contestants, all physically or mentally disabled,
assembled at the starting line for the100-yard dash.
At the gun, they all started out, not exactly in a
dash, but with a relish to run the race to the finish
and win. All, that is, except one little boy who
stumbled on the asphalt, tumbled over a couple of
times, and began to cry. The other eight heard the boy
cry. They slowed down and looked back. Then they all
turned around and went back......every one of them.
One girl with Down's Syndrome bent down and kissed him
and said, "This will make it better." Then all nine
linked arms and walked together to the finish line.
Everyone in the stadium stood, and the cheering went
on for several minutes. People who were there are
still telling the story.
Why?

Because deep down we know this one thing: What matters
in this life is more than winning for ourselves. What
matters in this life is helping others win, even if it
means slowing down and changing our course. If you
pass this on, we may be able to change our hearts as
well as someone else's.

"A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle"
So, what ya gonna do? pass this story on or erase it from your mind...?

⌂♦±◙▒²?&;☺└µ╙☻√∟é§Γ⌐╒♣┴½╗?¼?╥?◙═☺☻♥♦♣♠•◘○♂♀♪♫☼►◄↕‼¶§▬↨↑↓→←∟↔▲▼

Good W.O.W.

1) When things go wrong ... don't go with them.

2) I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.

Story from a wise man: Heed this advise.

I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend?
She was everything I had dreamt for!

There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister.
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses.
She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear.

It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.

One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check
the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived.
She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and
desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once
before I got married and committed my life to her sister.
I was in total shock and couldn't say a word.

She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me."
I was stunned.
I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs.
When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs
at me. OMG.....

I stood there for a moment, then turned and ran straight to the front door in shock and finding this was too unbelievable.
opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car.


AND....



My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you
have passed our little test.We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."


The moral of this story is: always keep your condoms in your car.

Here's a nice story about a famous American....
How come I never thought of that? Hrmm.
Quite True..!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
A city boy, Kenny, moved to the country and bought a
donkey from an old farmer for $100. The farmer agreed
to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day the
farmer drove up and said, "Sorry son, but I have some
bad news, the donkey died last night." Kenny replied:
"Well then, just give me my money back." The farmer
said:
"Can't do that. I went and spent it already."
Kenny said: "OK then, just unload the donkey."
The farmer asked: "What ya goanna do with him?"
Kenny: "I'm going to raffle him off." (Note: To raffle
is to sell a thing by lottery - draw lot to a group of
people each paying the same amount for a
ticket)
Farmer: "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!" Kenny:
"Sure ! I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody
he's dead." A month later the farmer met up with Kenny
and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?"
Kenny: "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two
dollars apiece and made a profit of $898."
Farmer: "Didn't anyone complain?"
Kenny: "Just the guy who won. So I gave him back his
two dollars." Kenny grew up and eventually became the
chairman of Enron (Kenneth Lay).

Morale of the story : You have to be a con-artist to
be rich.

I have come up with a theory. Which differentiates people between the curious and inquisitive from the ones who believe that life is all about following the norms in life. These people are termed as born followers. Here is my explanation.

A person who digs his ears or nose and checks for the output from the dig or find may be seen as curious people in life. And this would somehow lead them in life in pursuing their interest of their own and somehow more incline in that manner. They tend to be very cautious careful, wary and alert.

As for the people who just digs for the pleasure and benefit of the doubt, throws them right away before inspecting the packages tend to fall for surprises easily and are often cheated by con-artists.

Aquarius (Jan 21 - Feb 21)
DO'S
Aquarius are friendly and fascinating people. They have in-depth knowledge
about various subjects and you can converse with them for hours without
getting bored. They are capable of giving a lot of love that can be amazing.
They have a very broad outlook of life and you can relax in their presence.
They will always welcome your ideas and actions about humanitarian causes.
To keep an Aquarius lover interested you must possess that mysterious and
intriguing quality. Once hooked they will always be very faithful to you.
DON'TS
Do not expect or plan a normal, simple and predictable life with an Aquarius
partner. Aquarians are totally unpredictable. They can go to any direction
without giving any advance notice. They are basically very restless and get
bored easily. Though they are very friendly, do not expect them to reveal
their inner most feelings to you (they never will). They can be detached and
impersonal, which may seem strange to others.

The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying
to decide who was in charge.

Each organ took a turn speaking up:

Brain....I should be in charge because I run all body
functions.

Blood...I should be in charge because I circulate
oxygen for The brain.

Stomach...I should be in charge because I process food
to the brain.

Legs....I should be in charge because I take the brain
where it wants to go.

Eyes...I should be in charge because I let the brain
see where it's going.

Asshole...I should be in charge because I get rid of
your waste.

All the other parts laughed and made the asshole very
mad. To prove his point, the asshole immediately
slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days,
refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1-
Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief


Day 2 -
Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly

Day 3 -
Legs got cramps and became unstable

Day 4 -
Eyes became watery and vision became blurred

Day 5 -
Blood became toxic and poisoned the body

Day 6 -
The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in
charge.

The moral of the story:
No matter who you are, or how important you think you
are, you will find that it is always the Asshole that
is in charge.